06 August 2009

writer's block

What is writer's block, after all?  

Is it a mere fear that every hopeful author carries in a corner of his mind?  
Is it  a lack of thought and creativity?  
Perhaps it is yet another manifestation of the fear of man disguised as an oppressive state of the self.  
Or, . . . Is it the fate of a new direction trying to pass?


We all know that this hurdle is not just something in one's imagination.  Anyone who has attempted to write, paint, or enable any of the creative arts knows that this is a very real obstacle we all reach at one point or another.

Is it a mere fear that every hopeful author carries in a corner of his mind?



YHVH O'saynu, the LORD our maker (Ps 95,6) lives WITHIN us.
Elohim, creator (Gen 1,1; 17, 7) promised that His kingdom, everlasting, is in ME!  
What is my point with all the Hebrew references?  God is creative and not only is HIS creativity within me, but HE is within me.  Therefore, is it really practical to think that writer's block is one's inability to contrive and forge?  I don't think so.  

Is it a lack of thought and creativity?



"...I know, was spurred by the fear of men..." Jason Gray comments on his own writer's block seated prior to the making of his latest album release.  You can find his full article at The Rabbit Room.  I appreciate Mr. Gray's vulnerability on the topic.  We are all, of course, created to worship and the creative arts are all a facet of the expression of obedient worship we each carry in our hearts.  However, we don't always acknowledge the Trinity to be our only audience members.  More often than not, we consider the greater population (our churches, The Church, the World) our audience.  "What will they think?  Is it easy to read and understand?  Can they sing along?  Can they see what I see?  What if it is too dark?  What if the chords aren't so pleasing?  The melody and lyrics don't quite match.  The clay cracked.  The paint dripped."  We carry on about how "perfect" our creation must be to the eyes of man.  We lose track of the purpose of the creative arts.  We get wrapped into the realms of this dreaded paradigm called " the fear of man".

Perhaps it is yet another manifestation of the fear of man disguised as an oppressive state of the self.  checkmark. 16 black


A personal testimony:
In older blogs, I've written about my past as a writer.  I am a writer.  I always have been and I always will be.  I write short stories, poetry, lyrics, music, nonfiction, parables, and all the likes.  Until the last few years.  Some time during my years at UNL, I stopped writing.  Writing became such an effort that I associated with the classroom.  It wasn't a joy any longer.  It was what I had to do for all of my classes.  So, I stopped writing for pleasure, with intent for creative worship.  
You know what I am NOT good at?  Art.  Drawing and painting are two of my absolute weaknesses.  And you know what I've been longing to do the last couple of months?  Paint.  I don't know anything about painting.  Brush, paint, paper, canvas.. okay, I know four things about painting.  During our summer camp, I was attending a writing workshop and when it came time for our free-write... I had no words, but pictures and colors.  So, what did I do?  Paint.  *rolls eyes*  
My implication is not that every occurrence of no ink means we should try another manifestation of our creative gifts.  My suggestion is that perhaps there IS a change of direction.  Maybe not so drastic as becoming a painter instead of writer, but maybe if you mostly write one genre or style, it is time to write in a new way.  The Holy Spirit is bringing forth a season of something NEW.  It is a new life in which we live.  It could very well be that you don't have writer's block, it's just that the Holy Spirit is trying to take you into a new direction.  
Is it the fate of a new direction trying to pass?  checkmark. 16 black


Determining the source of writer's block doesn't speak of overcoming it.  

Resting.  Relaxing.  Acknowledging the presence of Yeshua.  Surrender.  Stillness.  Waiting.  Asking.  Worship in the contemporary form with music.  Reading the Word.  
These are my best solutions for defeating writer's block.

12 July 2009

few phrases

I am officially living in the largest living quarters I've had in 6 years!  WHOO HOO!  I moved up to Blast Hill yesterday and I've spent today unpacking.  I am waiting for a few pieces of furniture and then I can really settle, but it's starting to look like "my room" and it feels good to be here.  

The Youth Camp:Passion is this week (you can view the page in English by clicking the link under the main logo).  We run from Wednesday-Sunday.  It's going to be a BRILLIANT time!  I'm really excited for the camp.  

Immediately as the camp ends, Mandy arrives here in Graz.  I'll only have her for a couple of days, but when she leaves, I also will leave.  I'll go to Croatia for some time.  It is still open ended. 

I know; short, simple sentences... sorry.  Now, back to my nesting.  

30 June 2009

Urlaub? Not likely.

Quick/Important Announcement:  I've decided to apply to extend my Student Visa.  Please, be in prayer agreement that the paperwork runs smoothly and that the finances come through (support "letters" will be sent out soon).


"Oh great, summer's coming!  That means you'll have more free time, right?!  You gonna go somewhere for vacation?!"

Riggghhhttt... more free time.  Nope.  Not happening.  Not for this kid.  Summer is just as busy, if not busier, for me.  Sure, I'm not working or at the Uni, but there is PLENTY to do for Blast and Exousia that I am definitely BUSY.  With what, you may ask?  I need some prayer support for the following summer endeavors.

July:
1. German final
2. Hauskreis (House Group) (HK)
3. Vinex Meeting (Vinex is the combined youth groups from Exousia and Vineyard-Graz)
4. Rehearsal for camp worship.  Church.
6-10. Moving to Blast Hill.
9. HK
15.19. Youth Camp- Passion!
19-22. Mandy visits
22.-??. trip to Croatia for some full on ministry.  I'll be doing a lot of prayer/intercession ministry, as well as practically serving some specific families.  This will be an intense time that will have great impact on the region.  I've not set a solid plan as I'm not yet sure just how long Abba wants me there.  It is important that I am sensitive and wise about this time.
End of July. HK mini-retreat at Blast Hill

August:
1-16. SOW preparations and closings
6. HK
7. Vinex Meeting (tbd)
8. self declared DAY OFF
9. Vital SOW prep day in Brauhaus
10-15. SOW 
Mid/End of Aug. Return to Croatia for more ministry and maybe even a few days of REST!

During the weeks where it seems like "nothing" happens, there is PLENTY of planning work that I have to be doing.  The great thing about summer, though, is that I know I'll get a lot of good ice cream.  So, summer season, HERE I COME!

21 June 2009

Congrats, Mr. and Mrs. Williams!

There are a lot of things I've had to sacrifice since moving here.  Culture... language... job... relationships... comfort... familiarity... and so on.  One of the most difficult things to continually sacrifice, is being a consistent part of the lives of my friends and family.  The Rock Solid Pebbles are all growing up (quickly and gorgeously, I might add)... the KIDS from RS are growing up and graduating [Congrats, Kels and Steph (and all the others)!]... and the recent, most difficult sacrifice- weddings.  

Justin and Debbie married on Saturday 20.6.  Since I couldn't be AT the wedding, here's my blog tribute to this awesome couple.

This is a relationship I've seen go through the races and come out strong.  Their continual battle to keep Christ centered in their relationship is inspiring.  They stand together in the natural and supernatural, supporting one another with the greatest strength the Lord can provide.  They go into battle zones together and they go into the tent of David to worship together.  They love their friends unconditionally, together.  At times, I have advised them both to be "less serious" about some things... but their "seriousness" was only a quest for purity and true light between them.  Worshipful obedience is at the core of this relationship.  When the Lord told them to separate for a time, they painfully did so.  When Deb went to Sudan and Justin to Texas, they  clung to the cross in their relationship and persevered.  When they were together at UNL, they re-learned how to relate face-to-face with one another.  They learned how to accept change and growth in one another.  They learned how to encourage continued change and growth.  When the time came to separate again, they both were willing to sacrifice their own dreams and visions for the sake of the Kingdom.  Upon reuniting (again), they grew together in a new territory- where they could learn to manage life together within a new church family, a new ministry environment, and with a different type of spiritual support from their loved ones.
I have had the honor to know both Debbie and Justin as a couple and as individuals.  
With Deb, a relationship that began as a student-leader discipleship quickly became a very close, best-friendship, sisterhood.  She is one of the most reliable persons I know (even if she is running/thinking on African time).  She is disciplined, discerning, and growing more accurate in both.  She is a joy.  
With Justin, he started as "Debbie's shy boyfriend" who became one of the greatest, strongest, most courageous of my mighty men.  He always took everything I could offer and ran to the throne room with it to get more from God directly.  He is dependable, loyal, firm, and wise.  He is... crazy.
Their gentleness, humility, and willingness before the Lord is encouraging.  We've spent many nights praying, worshiping, sitting, crying, laughing, and exercising together.  I trust them both with my life and my crayons.  Aside from all the serious details- they are both fun.  Their adventurous flair compliments one another like coffee and cake.  Some of my most enjoyable, most embarrassing, most HILARIOUS memories are shared with this couple.  Some of my deepest, most rewarding/encouraging, and even most painful memories are shared with this couple.

Mr. Justin LeRoy and Mrs. Deborah Sue Williams- I love you.  You're two of the greatest and it is an honor to share in this carnal life with you.  I look forward to more memories - supernatural highs, circumstantial lows, fun, and crazy (I was crazy once...) memories.  When we meet face-to-face again, we'll share a toast with Asti and a glass of beer!